14 thoughts on “December 22, 2016

    • The employee handbook? Easy. “You’re scum, we’re God, your opinion doesn’t matter, facts don’t matter, it’s our way all ways, and if you don’t like it, keep it to yourself. And we can change the rules any damn time we like.” That’s pretty much every employee handbook in a nutshell. Oh, and some crap about uniforms, days off, and stuff like that.

    • I’ll read it if you’re not too cheap to buy people their own copies. If you just have one copy that you keep in the office and expect people to stay on-site to read, to heck with that noise.

  1. I was going to comment on how he had, because then he could get around the technicalities. But then I read trough the ”employee handbook”-tag and realised that it is very inconsistent whether or not he has read it, depending on what would be funniest in the specific situation. It can’t be explained away by him lying half the time.
    That disappoints a little, I must admit.

    • I don’t understand. In most cases, he says he hasn’t read it, in one case he skimmed it looking for loopholes, in one case there is only an implication that he read it (it doesn’t say that he CAN’T charge his car), and only a single comic from 2006 says that he might have actually read it.

    • I’d say on the whole, he hasn’t read it. Skimmed it, maybe. As for the Feb 24, 2012 strip, I’ll bet he’s bluffing and made it up on the spot.

  2. Ooh, Cooper, don’t tell Stuart you haven’t read the employee handbook! You know how he worships at the feet of Corporate and that book is his Bible. And he expects every employee to feel the way he does.

  3. Employee handbooks are all the same….show up on time, do your job, don’t do drugs, don’t drink on the job, don’t be mean to the customers, don’t steal, wear the uniform…

    Protections plans are all the same…don’t break your stuff because it probably won’t be covered and even if it is, we’ll come up with some excuse to blame it on you and not cover it anyway.

  4. Our protection plans are actually pretty good. If the item you’re purchasing is under $100 and it breaks down (because it’s made cheaply in the first place at that price) you’ll receive a gift card for the price you paid. If your item is more expensive (iPad, gaming system, etc.) it covers cracked screen, water damage, you can basically run it over with your car, and they’ll fix it for you and if it can’t be fixed you’ll get a gift card for the price you paid. Free shipping both ways. The TV plans kind of suck because they only cover manufacturer defect, but they do include delivery and installation now.

    My biggest issue with them is no one keeps their receipt or registers them and most people don’t even keep the warranty itself and a year and a half later there’s. I thing we can do to help them if they don’t have the receipt and didn’t register the plan. Every time I sell one I make sure to tell them “you have the full 2/3 years to register the plan, but if you do it right away you don’t have to keep your receipt” probably confuses most people, especially if all they hear is “you don’t have to keep the receipt” but otherwise they’re just going to throw it all away anyway.

    My store sold roughly 300 protection plans my first year working electronics and 290 of them were sold by me. I hate upselling, but even I used to purchase our protection plans. The one time I didn’t I severely regretted it ($300 pair of beats which I found out 6 month later were complete garbage. Most of those protection plans I sold were on beats headphones after that)

  5. Dude, the old Ritz Camera protection plan covered everything except fire, theft, and loss (and presumably intentional destruction). Literally anything was covered, as long as you could bring in the remains, and they weren’t burned.
    One dude brought the shards in a plastic zip lunch bag.

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