30 thoughts on “June 28, 2016

  1. I’m not sure of any store that would list an extension to the receiver’s desk in their menu… So logic would dictate, if you’re calling that desk you’re an employee of the company.

    But there’s that pesky “L” word…

    • If it is like my store, all extensions for the departments are the same. Also, if it is early morning, Stuart would know to get an actual person, you call receiving

    • One store I worked at was set up that if the customer service person at the fitting room (where all calls were initially answered normally) did not answer it quickly enough, that every phone in the store except those on the registers rang. And overnights (after 1030 PM and before 8AM), the phones were switched to every phone rang.

    • Or Cooper got stuck covering the phones for a bit (main phone could have been on “night ring” where you hear it on the overhead PA speakers or it could have been forwarded to his extension.

  2. Yeah, go through the long spheal that the person answering doesn’t want to say, and the person calling doesn’t want to hear.

  3. If I wanted to talk on the phone I would have gotten a job as a receptionist. But no. I work in the stockroom. Where I can TRY to avoid talking to people.

  4. When I read the last panel at first I thought Cooper said “More than you have left, hopefully” which might have been even funnier. In other words, Stuart won’t live long enough to hear Cooper say the greeting “properly.” I think he did fine. I don’t want to hear a load of spiel when I call either. Someone rattling off some greeting they were forced to memorize a mile a minute and I can’t make it out. Just give me the name of the place I called so I know I dialed the number right. Then let me ask my own questions, thank you!

  5. It’s funny how they are still talking with a disconnected handset… (Follow the cord from the phone in the last panel and see where it ends.)

    • Cooper, this is the ghost of work ethic calling. Tell your bosses to stop buying golden yachts and get on the sales floor.

      • Excuse me, work ethic? Cooper is the Freight supervisor, and you and I see him in the back working on freight paperwork! Cooper may be the king of knowing how to goof off, but he sure isn’t doing it now. Or, if you’re implying Cooper should tell Stuart to get on the sales floor, oh, dear, I… have no nice way of responding to that.

  6. If Cooper worked up front, Stuart would have a valid point. But since he doesn’t talk to customers all that often, he can answer the phone any way he wants.

  7. I agree, nobody wants to hear the introduction. It’s like going to the drive through. “Welcome to X Coffee Shop, would you like to try our new triple latte mocha drink?” They should just say, may I help you. Great work Cooper.

  8. Yeah, everyone knows you’re supposed to say: “Hello, and thank you kindly for calling Grumbel’s in Smithfield, where friendly customer service is our number-one priority. Please ask an associate such as myself about our new autumn line, currently in stock! This is Cooper speaking, how may I promptly help you on this lovely day?”

    I think that needs a few more adverbs, but such rants are not necessary and only serve to drive customers away. A simple “Grumbel’s in Smithfield, this is Cooper. How may I help you?” gets the point across without adding the adverbly fluff.

    • And, of course, once you get through that whole spiel, the first thing out of the customer’s mouth is inevitably “Is this Grumbel’s?”

      • This, if it’s not a sales or robo-call……..been asked if I wanted a newspaper description before, once the caller realized he called a store and that there was no lady of the house to speak to.

      • “The one in Smithfield?”

        Corporate probably expects a reply such as:
        “I appreciate you fielding my call and thank you justly. I am, in fact, very interested in your new autumn line! I would love to hear every exquisite detail.”
        Instead of, you know, the actual reason they’re calling. Just to ask if they have munge or something in stock. Six words. The longer something is, the less likely the customer is to remember it all. Have the corporate stooges never conversed on the phone before?

        • Talk on the phone? Of course not! They’d never do something so plebeian. That’s what secretaries are for. Their time is much too valuable. It might make them 30 seconds later than their fashionably late arrival for their golf game.

      • Of course, because by that time the caller has drifted off, zoned out and forgotten.

        As for that last bit of corporate talk, the ship has long sailed on “promptly”.

  9. I seriously hate when I call a store and have a quick question or want to be transferred to a different department, but I have to sit and listen through a 5 min scripted spiel from the poor person answering the phone. At no time has a long winded speech about how your store can save money ever convinced a new customer to shop there, especially when they are already calling into the store, which prob means they are a customer already.

      • If it’s a voice menu system, you can usually select a number option, if you know it, as soon as the recording starts playing. Failing that, press zero. Doesn’t always work, but worth a shot.

  10. I once had a manager get critical with me because I didn’t answer the phone properly.

    Worth mentioning that the company was going through bankruptcy, and our store was less than two weeks away from closing for good.

    What’s funnier was that this was an assistant manager. The manager didn’t care about what I did, as long as I showed up to work. I even answered a few calls from the district manager, who cared even less, because I was a disposable pawn from the beginning.

  11. Brings back memories of when I worked customer service for the phone company. “Thank you for calling **&*, this is Jesse; how may I help you?” I worked with helping customers who primarily made international calls. Calls to country’s that had phone lines made before WWII, and had weather that constantly knocked out service. The people knew my “greeting” and usually interrupted before I got to “**&*.”

    Sometimes, I would use the company’s, at the time, full name and listen to the silence before they asked if they had reached **&*. A manager tried to write me up for that, but the Union rep, pointed out that in the hand book it said to use the company name. I loved looking for loop holes.

  12. I remember once management gave us this long spiel they wanted us to start using, something like “Thank you for calling [company name], [department name], this is [my name], how may I help you?”

    One of my co-workers got a call from a regular customer. When she got through the new greeting he said “What the hell is that shit? Are you kidding me?” or something to that effect.

    So she went back to her old greeting: “[Department], [Name].”

    Don’t change what works.

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